Posts tagged sollux

themockingcrows:

Honestly, I’m shocked at myself. The request was made by an Anon, and.. well. I actually made it more depraved than it was supposed to be. I’m a little disgusted with myself, frankly, but. Here it is. 

BEWARE: HARDCORE PORN UNDER HERE. PURE HOMESMUT. PORNSPIRATION ALL UP IN THIS BITCH. CLEAR OUT YOUR CHILDREN. Please. Don’t think any less of me. D:

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FILTHY DIRTY

(Source: TheMockingCrows)

brainbent:

Morning breaks and you feel no better than you did yesterday. You are pulled out of sleep by the sounds of John getting ready for breakfast. The sun is shining and everything is offensively bright and cheerful, including your roommate.

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oh noooooooo aud sadstucked and it’s really good.

(holla to my bummed out bros on the web.)

mageofform:

brainbent:

AG: That guy? He is totally ace.

TA: 2tfu vrii2ka, iim trying two watch my 2how.

EB: no way dude, dave’s enormously gay. rose and kanaya were talking about that pflag thing the other day and how he—

AG: Noooooooope.

TA: NO ONE CARE2, LET IIT GO.

EB: yuh-huh. look at all his rugged rap star posters. those are not the posters of a man immune to the power of the pork steeple.

AG: The power of the WH8????????

EB: the power of the shut up serket. my statement stands.

AG: Yeah, except I happen to know for a fact—

TA: wiill you guy2 plea2e 2top go22iippiing about thii2 2tupiid bull2hiit? or ju2t take iit 2omewhere that ii2 not the tv room?? je2u2 chrii2t, hiigh 2chool ii2 OVER.

AG: You’re just jealous Strider doesn’t wanna hit that, four-eye2. >:::;D

TA: yeah 2ure, now that my cover ii2 blown, can we all agree two ju2t 2hut up about the douchebag2 underaged junk plea2e?

AG: No, 8ecause Eg8ert is a dum8ass who 8elieves dum8ass things and is DUM8.

EB: it’s not dumb! i just get a really strong vibe of dong worship off the dude. he pings my gaydar really really hard.

TA: egbert, you trea2onou2 man-dork, ii thought we were bro2.

EB: we are!

TA: and yet ii cant help notiiciing that you are not gtfo-iing liike a bro.

TA: you are 2tay-iin-here-iing wiith the 2piiderbiitch and 2preadiing your weiird 2talker go22iip all over my awe2ome cookiing program.

EB: fine, i’ll shush.

TA: THANK you.

EB: but how do you know he’s asexual?

AG: 8ecause he told me, stuuuuuuuupid!

EB: oh. okay then.

TA: OK THA2 IIT, FUCK YOU BOTH. IIM OUT.

EB: rude!

AG: Sheeeeeeeesh, SOME people.

EB: so does that mean he won’t, like, go out with anyone ever? 

AG: What am I, a mind reader? Ask him yours8lf!

This is my dashboard everyday.

There is literally /always/ a “is he gay or asexual” debate going on about one of the Homestuck characters.

Yeah, BB is sort of a clearinghouse for headcanons and in-jokes, and this conversation was one of them. 

I love my mad gay fandom <3

brainbent:

AG: That guy? He is totally ace.

TA: 2tfu vrii2ka, iim trying two watch my 2how.

EB: no way dude, dave’s enormously gay. rose and kanaya were talking about that pflag thing the other day and how he—

AG: Noooooooope.

TA: NO ONE CARE2, LET IIT GO.

EB: yuh-huh. look at all his rugged rap star posters. those are not the posters of a man immune to the power of the pork steeple.

AG: The power of the WH8????????

EB: the power of the shut up serket. my statement stands.

AG: Yeah, except I happen to know for a fact—

TA: wiill you guy2 plea2e 2top go22iippiing about thii2 2tupiid bull2hiit? or ju2t take iit 2omewhere that ii2 not the tv room?? je2u2 chrii2t, hiigh 2chool ii2 OVER.

AG: You’re just jealous Strider doesn’t wanna hit that, four-eye2. >:::;D

TA: yeah 2ure, now that my cover ii2 blown, can we all agree two ju2t 2hut up about the douchebag2 underaged junk plea2e?

AG: No, 8ecause Eg8ert is a dum8ass who 8elieves dum8ass things and is DUM8.

EB: it’s not dumb! i just get a really strong vibe of dong worship off the dude. he pings my gaydar really really hard.

TA: egbert, you trea2onou2 man-dork, ii thought we were bro2.

EB: we are!

TA: and yet ii cant help notiiciing that you are not gtfo-iing liike a bro.

TA: you are 2tay-iin-here-iing wiith the 2piiderbiitch and 2preadiing your weiird 2talker go22iip all over my awe2ome cookiing program.

EB: fine, i’ll shush.

TA: THANK you.

EB: but how do you know he’s asexual?

AG: 8ecause he told me, stuuuuuuuupid!

EB: oh. okay then.

TA: OK THA2 IIT, FUCK YOU BOTH. IIM OUT.

EB: rude!

AG: Sheeeeeeeesh, SOME people.

EB: so does that mean he won’t, like, go out with anyone ever? 

AG: What am I, a mind reader? Ask him yours8lf!

420 reblog urself errday

brainbent:

CG: IF IT STOPS HIM WANDERING AROUND YOWLING FOR ASS, IT’LL BE WORTH IT.

TA: kk, what ii2 wrong wiith you?

EB: my first guess would be, a lot!

AG: Fucking swoooooooon!

CG: IT’S NOT TOO LATE TO ADD BOTH OF YOU TO MY SPAY/NEUTER LIST.

AG: We 8e fucked.

EB: snerrrrrrrrk!

TA: oh 2hiit now 2he2 gonna 2tart quotiing that fuckiing moviie two?

AG: Yep.

AG: Deal with it! >::::D

TA: ugh.

TA: iim goiing two go eat 2ome bleach now.

AG: L8er, 8uttlick!

AND NOW WE KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU SHOW HUMAN VRISKA CON AIR.